


paper promises

by baeconandeggs, carpesoo



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Break Up, Established Relationship, M/M, broken!endgame
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-29
Updated: 2018-05-29
Packaged: 2019-05-15 18:27:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14795675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baeconandeggs/pseuds/baeconandeggs, https://archiveofourown.org/users/carpesoo/pseuds/carpesoo
Summary: byun baekhyun learns that time moves in one direction, memory in another.





	paper promises

**Author's Note:**

> **Prompt #:** BAE094  
>  **Disclaimer: baeconandeggs/the mods is/are not the author/s of this story. Authors will be credited and tagged after reveals.** The celebrities' names/images are merely borrowed and do not represent who the celebrities are in real life. No offense is intended towards them, their families or friends. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. No money is being made from this fictional work. No copyright infringement is intended.
> 
>  **Author's Note:** many thanks to m, k, and u (the reader).

  
byun baekhyun catches a glimpse of the bus he needs to catch whizz by. “fuck!” he swears out loud as he breaks into a sprint, hoping he’ll make it in time..

he doesn’t.

missing it by mere seconds, he curses the bus driver for not waiting those extra seconds before pulling away. it’s not like the bus is going anywhere anyway, held by a red light several yards away from the stop. he runs ahead and knocks on the window, hoping he’ll be lucky and get a bus driver with a conscience.

he’s not.

the bus driver merely shakes his head before turning his eyes back to the road. still stationary.

“you’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” baekhyun growls, flipping the bus driver off with no regard for the passengers watching him lose his cool.

pulling his phone out of his pocket, he checks the time. shit, it’s past midnight. he opens his travel app to see when the next bus is due to arrive. twenty-seven minutes, with a second bus just two minutes behind. of course—it’s just his luck (or lack thereof.)

baekhyun knows his husband—park chanyeol—is probably going to be waiting for his return. his big round eyes barely open and his deep voice laced with exhaustion, he’ll ask baekhyun, “why are you back so late?” despite baekhyun having told him a thousand times already before that it’s not by choice. it’s not like he wants to slave away at the office all day and well into the night.

their arguments lately all have seemed to revolve around baekhyun working late. in fact, they’ve had at least nine spats this week alone and it’s only friday.  
baekhyun has been feeling guilty, his recent promotion resulting in early mornings and late nights. but he’s just had a meeting with his superior that morning. starting next week, he’s to return back to his old nine am to six pm schedule. baekhyun’s sure chanyeol will be pleased to hear it.

there’s a little voice in the back of baekhyun’s head that tells him they’ll still wind up having a screaming match, if not about this, then something else. if they weren’t fighting about baekhyun arriving home deep into the night, far later than chanyeol would usually stay up (not that baekhyun had ever asked him to), chanyeol would somehow find a way to piss him off. like leaving the empty carton of milk in the fridge instead of just throwing it out, or always forgetting to put the cap back on the tube of toothpaste.

that’s not to say baekhyun is without flaws. as of late, what has started to become nearly intolerable to baekhyun is his husband’s almost saintly ability to forgive him. it didn’t matter what baekhyun would do, turning up late to a date, forgetting to buy a new light bulb for their bedside table despite being reminded over and over again, or falling asleep that one time they were making love.

chanyeol would never raise his voice, he wouldn’t even scold or lecture him. he’d just wait for baekhyun to accept fault and apologise. and with a nod of the head, chanyeol would smile and say, “it’s okay, i forgive you,” without hesitation and free of any residual resentment. and he’d never dredge up baekhyun’s past failings to use against him, either—unfortunately, something that baekhyun is guilty of doing to chanyeol. the only time chanyeol really shows any major signs of annoyance is when baekhyun doesn’t take good care of himself.

unlike his husband, baekhyun is never one to to hold back his temper, hurling an onslaught of angry words at the other, words deliberately meant to hurt him. but chanyeol would just sit there without saying a word, nodding his head every now and then. and when baekhyun has finished saying his piece, chanyeol would pull him into a hug and apologise for his mistakes.

in the eight years they’ve been together, baekhyun has never been able to remain angry at chanyeol for very long. but with things never staying constant, baekhyun has found himself hardening. chanyeol’s silence now spurs him on, often sending him into a rage. he knows it’s not right and that just makes it worse. baekhyun compares himself to his husband and feels unworthy. that feeling of inferiority expanding until it bubbles over in the form of an anger he’s unable to suppress. so he lashes out and immediately after he’s flooded with regret, feeling like an utter failure as a human. as a husband.

the cycle repeats over and over.

baekhyun finally reaches home just past one am. this is the latest he’s returned from work and he’s not sure if chanyeol would be fast asleep by now. baekhyun deliberates on whether or not he should wake his partner if he hasn’t stayed awake—there were too many words left unsaid and issues left unresolved when he’d left for work this morning. perhaps it would be best if he were to address it at a more appropriate hour.

opening the door and tossing his keys into the bowl by the front door, he kicks off his shoes. half expecting his husband to burst into the hallway to greet him, baekhyun is instead met with silence. he can’t help but notice the internal sigh of relief. “hey, chanyeol? i’m sorry i’m late!” he calls out to his spouse.

still nothing.

is chanyeol throwing a strop and giving him the silent treatment? or could it be that chanyeol is already fast asleep? baekhyun is a little surprised that his husband isn’t camped out in the living room, playing video games as an excuse to wait up for him.

not wanting to risk getting into another fight—baekhyun is far too tired—he decides against calling out for his husband again. he sheds his jacket and scarf, hanging them on the coat rack before putting his shoes away. blowing into his hands, he notices that the apartment is much colder than usual. is the heating broken or something?

entering the vacant front room, baekhyun checks the thermostat, perplexed as to why it’s turned off despite the freezing cold temperature. especially peculiar seeing as chanyeol is usually one to crank it to the max, dissatisfied unless it’s practically a live-in sauna. baekhyun, on the other hand, not wanting to feel like he’s roasting on a bbq, prefers it much cooler. anything above twenty degrees is too much for his liking.

baekhyun turns on the heating, hoping chanyeol hasn’t already caught a cold—an ill chanyeol is the equivalent of a super needy clingy puppy. baekhyun isn’t quite sure if he’s got the energy to massage vicks vaporub all over chanyeol’s chest twelve times an hour. especially since he’s extremely ticklish, prone to losing control of his limbs if baekhyun so much as grazes his chest. and although they’ve no real plans for the weekend, baekhyun would much rather spend his time doing more productive things. like binge watching netflix or playing video games on his pc.

baekhyun quietly opens the door to their bedroom, the room pitch black. “you asleep?” he asks, quietly tiptoeing to the entrance of their ensuite bathroom. he pauses for a second, to wait for a response but when met with silence, he shrugs it off and slips into the bathroom as quietly as he can.

he closes the door gently, fumbling in the dark to locate the light switch. after running his hand over the same patch of wall for an eternity, his fingers finally graze the switch, the light flickering on and illuminating the room. he approaches the sink, staring at his reflection in the mirror. he can see the dark circles under his eyes and wrinkles he’s never noticed before. despite looking younger than his age, baekhyun is entering his thirties—the years are slowly starting to turn on him, leaving marks as they pass.

baekhyun turns on the faucet, he splashes some water onto his face. his eyes fall on his bare hands, in particular his left ring finger. tracing over the vacant spot where his wedding band has always resided, baekhyun flashes back to the argument he’d had with his husband the night before.

 

_in all honesty, baekhyun can’t even recall what had sparked their current situation. they’ve been exchanging words—and by they—it just means baekhyun. and in the heat of the moment, he had blurted out the words he never thought he’d ever say, “i don’t think i can do this anymore. i’m just so tired, chanyeol.”_

_baekhyun can feel the warmth of chanyeol’s palms as he takes baekhyun’s hands into his. it’s too hot and clammy but baekhyun doesn't resist._

_“me, too. let’s just go to bed and forget about it all, hmm?” chanyeol’s voice is soft, unbearably so._

_and for one brief moment, baekhyun feels something he’s never experienced before. unable to contain the feeling inside of him, baekhyun pulls away from chanyeol’s grasp. words escape his lips, ones he could never take back. “no, i mean i’m tired of_ this _. you, me,_ us _.”_

_there’s an expression on chanyeol’s face that baekhyun immediately recognised—pain. a look of hurt present in chanyeol’s eyes, almost as if he were scared to speak, and yet with a trembling voice, he asks, “what are you saying, baekhyunnie?”_

_“i don’t know,” baekhyun replies with a heavy sigh._

_and he really didn’t._

_it’s not like baekhyun has given it much thought. perhaps he’s been afraid to. scared to admit it to himself that if he really evaluated his feelings, he’d come to the conclusion that he was no longer in love with chanyeol in the way he once was._

_could it be true?_

_baekhyun looks into chanyeol’s eyes, searching for something he feels like he’s lost recently. chanyeol has always been the source of his happiness, the one he couldn’t bear to be apart from, the love of his life._

_chanyeol takes hold of baekhyun’s hands once more, his long fingers tracing the wedding band on baekhyun’s hand. it almost feels like the ring has tightened its grip on baekhyun’s finger, restricting the blood flow. baekhyun loses feeling in his hand, the sensation slowly spreading up his arm. shaking off chanyeol’s hand, baekhyun slips off his wedding ring, placing it on the coffee table before taking several steps toward the bedroom. “i just don’t know anymore.”_

_“but what about your promise…_ our _promise? we said...” chanyeol doesn’t finish his sentence, but baekhyun still understands exactly what he means._

_baekhyun doesn’t know how to respond. he knows he can’t offer chanyeol the reassurance the other is desperately seeking, despite wanting nothing more than to comfort him. but he doesn’t want to be dishonest—to chanyeol and more importantly, to himself._

_“i’m sorry, chanyeol.”_

_baekhyun isn’t exactly sure what he was apologising for—his harsh words; hastened actions; the inability to take them all back and fix everything._

_baekhyun doesn’t sleep well that night and wakes up in the same state he had fallen asleep—overwhelmed and alone. chanyeol is no longer on the couch where baekhyun had left him the night before. the wedding band, however, still sits on the table when baekhyun leaves for work that morning._

_it’s the longest they’ve gone without speaking since they exchanged wedding vows five years prior. it’s also the first time he’s ever left the house without wearing his ring. at first baekhyun had felt somewhat triumphant that he’d finally managed to faze chanyeol with his brazen actions. his feelings had quickly turned into guilt when chanyeol hadn’t slipped into their bed that night, pulling baekhyun into an embrace, his gentle breaths tickling the back of baekhyun’s neck._

_a new sense of dread forms in the pit of his stomach as baekhyun sits behind his desk, routinely checking his phone to see if chanyeol had messaged him._

_no new notifications._

 

baekhyun’s phone buzzes, drawing his attention back to the present. it’s a reminder to pick up a new bulb for the nightstand lamp—which he’s forgotten to do of course. with a sigh, baekhyun finishes washing up, before exiting the bathroom. moving slowly, shrouded in complete darkness, baekhyun makes his way to the bed. he lifts the sheets carefully, cautious to not wake chanyeol, and climbs onto the mattress.

something feels off.

“chanyeol?”

baekhyun reaches out for his husband but his hand grabs only air. turning on the lamp on the bedside table, baekhyun is temporarily blinded by the bright light and surprised that the lamp actually turned on. chanyeol must’ve taken it upon himself to pick up the bulb and replace it rather than rely on baekhyun to.

baekhyun turns his attention back to the bed—chanyeol isn’t there. he rises to his feet, and screams chanyeol’s name at the top of his lungs, “chanyeol? are you home?”

he exits the bedroom and makes his way to the front door, he frowns when he notices chanyeol’s favourite trainers aren’t there. upon closer inspection baekhyun notices quite a few of chanyeol’s shoes are missing. he quickly paces back to the bedroom, making long strides toward the closet. with trembling hands, he opens the door and loses the strength to stand when he observes a half empty wardrobe.

crawling back to his side of the bed, baekhyun grabs his phone from the nightstand and dials chanyeol’s number. holding the handset to his ear, baekhyun hears the words he fears the most. “the number you have called is currently unavailable—”

what is happening? where is chanyeol? baekhyun wants to call their friends to find out if they know the whereabouts of his husband but he’s aware it’s not an appropriate time—it would have to wait for the morning.

and until then, baekhyun is faced with the reality that their marriage might be over. he returns to the living room to retrieve his wedding ring, but it’s no longer sitting where he left it. maybe chanyeol had taken it with him when he packed up and left.

climbing back into bed, baekhyun stares at the ceiling for a while. one might describe baekhyun’s reaction to the news as indifferent but he actually doesn’t know how to process his emotions. sure, he feels a ripple of sadness settling in.

but he will be okay.

what with the endless bickering, baekhyun supposes that some part of him—deep down—already knew they were on a sinking ship and it was only a matter of time before they called it.

an unavoidable inevitable outcome.

trying to clear his mind, baekhyun closes his eyes and forces himself to fall asleep.

 

_“okay, park chanyeol, i personally think that you should always forgive me, no matter what.” baekhyun asks with a bright toothy smile, his hands wrapping themselves around chanyeol’s waist._

_“seems like i’m getting the short end of the stick here.” chanyeol’s lips form the most adorable pout in the world._

_baekhyun grabs the back of chanyeol’s neck, planting a firm kiss on his lips. “there, happy now?”_

_“hmm, not quite. though i_ might _consider it if you promise me you’ll always love me.” chanyeol leans in and presses their lips together once more, this time slipping in his tongue. “but there’s one thing i’ll never forgive you for and that’s if you ever stop loving me, byun baekhyun,” he whispers into baekhyun’s mouth._

_“i couldn’t even if i wanted to. i’ll always love you, i promise.” baekhyun moans as hands start to explore his body, his own responding to all of chanyeol’s touches. “so you have to promise you won’t ever leave me. pinky swear?”_

_baekhyun looks deep into chanyeol’s eyes, offering his pinky finger. there isn’t a shred of doubt in his heart that this is the one promise baekhyun would never break—how could he ever stop loving chanyeol?_

_“i can think of another way to seal the deal.” chanyeol’s rosy lips form a grin as he wraps his fingers around baekhyun’s wrist, leading him toward the bedroom._

_they don’t sleep much that night, instead consummating their love for one another. baekhyun murmurs chanyeol’s name over and over as pleasure takes control of his body. he sinks his teeth into chanyeol’s neck to suppress his euphoria, their hips grinding together. he’s close to climaxing, and he knows chanyeol is too as their pace quickens, chanyeol pounding into him deeper and deeper._

_“baekhyunnie!”_

 

baekhyun wakes up from his deep slumber, the dream replaying over in his head. or rather it had been a long distant memory of the moments before chanyeol had proposed to him all those years prior.

“chanyeol?” rubbing the sleep from his eyes, baekhyun sits up resting his back against the headstand.

slowly coming to his senses, he frowns when he discovers the vacant space beside him. it takes another few moments before he recalls the events of the previous night. retrieving his phone, he dials chanyeol’s number again.

“the number you have called is currently—“

hanging up, baekhyun begins composing a message:

_**when srs you coning home we ned to tslk** _

typing without his glasses proving to be too much of a challenge—there’s no doubt the text is riddled with typos—baekhyun reaches for his glasses from the top drawer of his nightstand. his vision restored, baekhyun notices an ivory envelope nestled inside of the drawer.

baekhyun unseals the flap, emptying the contents onto the bed. out fall two wedding bands and a small piece of paper. baekhyun stares at the words he’s heard chanyeol say so many times:

“ _i forgive you._ ”

after what feels like an eternity, baekhyun places the items back into the envelope and returns it back in the drawer before closing it. . he picks up his phone again, deleting the words that appear on the screen. there’s no point in asking anymore, baekhyun already knows the answer.

chanyeol is never coming back.

instead, baekhyun types a new message before hitting send. he’s not sure if chanyeol will ever read it, but baekhyun sincerely hopes that he does.

_**i forgive you, too.** _

 


End file.
